Expressing Myself

These are the entries to a Washington Post Competition asking for a Two-Line Rhyme with the most romantic first line but the least romantic second line

My darling, my lover, my beautiful wife:
Marrying you screwed up my life.

I see your face when I am dreaming.
That’s why I always wake up screaming.

Kind, intelligent, loving and hot;
This describes everything you are not.

I thought that I could love no other
— that is until I met your brother.

I want to feel your sweet embrace;
But don’t take that paper bag off your face.

I love your smile, your face, and your eyes
— Damn, I’m good at telling lies!

My love, you take my breath away.
What have you stepped in to smell this way?

My feelings for you no words can tell,
Except for maybe “Go to hell.”

What inspired this amorous rhyme?
Two parts vodka, one part lime