Expressing Myself

These are the entries to a Washington Post Competition asking for a Two-Line Rhyme with the most romantic first line but the least romantic second line

My darling, my lover, my beautiful wife:
Marrying you screwed up my life.

I see your face when I am dreaming.
That’s why I always wake up screaming.

Kind, intelligent, loving and hot;
This describes everything you are not.

I thought that I could love no other
— that is until I met your brother.

I want to feel your sweet embrace;
But don’t take that paper bag off your face.

I love your smile, your face, and your eyes
— Damn, I’m good at telling lies!

My love, you take my breath away.
What have you stepped in to smell this way?

My feelings for you no words can tell,
Except for maybe “Go to hell.”

What inspired this amorous rhyme?
Two parts vodka, one part lime

“The best things in life are unexpected – because there were no expectations.”

– Eli Khamarov

Short Messaging Service …  could be dangerous … heres one I got for the New Years from a friend of  mine

“Some greeting …
my luv to ur fly… 🙂
tc”

And for the benefit of those, who are new to this science of abrevation!
fly = Family
tc = Take Care